I love shoes?

Some close friends got married the other day. It was a beautiful ceremony and I was very honoured to be a part of their wonderful day. It got me thinking though... we live in such a fickle world. One where the word 'love' is thrown around and thrown away just as easily and carelessly. And it made me realise how afraid of the word I have come to be.

I love pork. I love eating. I love chocolates. I love food. I love the beach. I love cocktails. Easy... I

I love you? Not so easy...

No matter how much I want to say it, it scares the shit out of me. It overwhelms me. It makes me feel vulnerable. When did I become so afraid of it? I am an idealist... a romantic... hell, I am a believer. But all of a sudden I am goddamn scared. Not of love... more than anything in the world, I am ready to give it, and feel it and believe in it. But saying it... do the words really matter if every part of your being feels it? I want to be courageous like my friends, and be able to say 'I love you'... because that's the honest truth. My heart knows it, my head knows it, it is written over my whole being and across my soul. But the words are stuck in my throat... they haven't quite managed to make it much further than that. I'm afraid that I might not hear the same back. I'm afraid of getting hurt. I'm scared that I might have a big piece of spinach in my teeth or a booger hanging out of my nose and I will look like a total idiot.

Help me cyber world! How can I proclaim my love to all who take their time to read my blog, but not to the one whom I really love?