When it rains, it pours!

Well wouldn't you know it? Both Mr and Salsa Boy text me, and organised to meet up. And I have resolved myself with the fact that I enjoy spending time with both of them, and I should stop thinking about it more than I need to! After always being in relationships, I suppose it was strange hanging out with a guy who I like and respect and not needing to be in a relationship with that person, and for it to be mutual... So that's that. They're both great guys, and I was just thinking myself into a frenzy, when all I am actually doing is meeting new people and making new friends. Women? Why do we have to think about everything so much? I got to de-brief on life with Mr (it was almost like therapy), then I got to salsa the night away with Salsa Boy (who really is my fave dance partner ever). Single life is grand :)

Food... Seriously!

Today I had a lovely meal at Neil Perry's new restaurant Spice Temple. The food was fantastic, and the service was great. Now, before I go on any further I want to set things straight and say that this isn't another one of those 'food blogs'. There are plenty out there, and I think they definitely serve a purpose. But such blogs, and food reviews leave me disconcerted much of the time. I live for food. It is my one great love. And the most wonderful thing about food, is that it is so personal - almost like a religion. Each experience is individual and unique. What you are tasting in your mouth - the flavours, the textures, the way it takes you back to a distant memory... might be completely different to the person sitting next to you eating the same dish. The thing with 'food blogs' and 'reviews', is often I find the writers forget how subjective food is, and rather than reviewing their experiences, they write judgements about food. Ruth Reichl, a past food reviewer for the New York Times writes a wonderful thing in her book 'Garlic & Sapphires' about how uncomfortable reviewing food made her feel sometimes, as we don't even know if an apple tastes the same to one person as it does to the next. Of course there is a lot to learn from people with developed palates, and who are experienced with dining out. And I definitely think it's great to have some kind of guide as to places to eat. But, I can't write about food like that... it's feels too betraying. Like I'm disclosing information about the intimate moments I've shared with a lover. I know, it's corny. But seriously, I don't really think I should be sharing with people the things that go on inside my mouth... Instead, I will write about WHY I eat out, what I'm continually learning about food and why I love it more with each day that goes by. It has been such a wonderful journey for me discovering food, and I only wish more Australians would learn to see the value and art of eating and dining. The amazement of something simple like a piece of chicken being reinveted in so many different ways... or discovering a million flavours you've never even dreamt of tasting (things that go way beyond salty, sour, sweet & bitter)... or eating obscure vegetables like spaghetti squash (or if you're like me growing up in a Filipino household, such vegetables like leek, fennel and so forth were foreign and unusual to me!)... the list goes on and on. It is such a privilege to taste and appreciate such art and labour. I don't really think people realise how labour intensive cooking can be. Chefs work more than anyone else I know. And it disappoints me that food is so easily disregarded. Wow... I got really deep there for a minute! But, food is my passion... the first thing I think of when I wake up (I'm always starving!) and the last thing on my mind when I go to bed (I'm normally feeling full & bloated!). So this is my declaration of love for food! Let's learn to love it and cherish it, for all the days of our lives... let us not forget that this simple necessity, is a thing of wonder and beauty!

Another night at the whorehouse...

Dining out is an art. And, if you can liken fine art to porn, then working in a restaurant can be very much akin to working in a whorehouse. As any artist knows, giving the world art is giving the world your soul, and if people don't want to understand it or can't appreciate it, then they shouldn't be looking at it in the first place. Like porn. Like a restaurant. Like a whorehouse. In order to get the full experience of any of these things, you must be open mided, and aware of where you are and what you are doing. Because while you're getting off (in which ever of the above scenarios you choose), more than likely it's while someone else is getting rammed up the arse with a smile on their face. If you're looking for quick, cheap and easy, then there are plenty of magazines out there, or McDonalds, or the tranny trying to make a quick buck on Liverpool Street. But if you want an 'experience', then you must respect the artists who lube up every night to make your night a memorable one. And remember, leaving 'gratuity' doesn't mean just saying 'thanks'.

Mushy Mess

After having coffee with a girlfriend this afternoon, and chit chatting girly styles, I gave in and sent a text to Salsa Boy. Okay, so I said I wouldn't CALL him... texting is totally different. But seriously as my oh so Wise friend said... "What are you so afraid of?" Well... I wasn't sure? I think I was afraid that I might come across as being desperate for him? I only sent him a text last week... and even though I told him I'm not after a relationship, I feel like maybe he still thinks I do? Plus I want to be a super cool cucumber and not be the one who is always making the initial contact. But again, as Wise One pointed out... "What do you have to lose?" Hmmmm.... nothing I guess? So I gave in right there and then and sent him a message asking if he'd be out tonight. I got a prompt reply saying he was still away, but that he'd be back next week. I even got a kiss at the end! So that's that. So much for being firm... I have officially turned into an overripe mushy persimmon that's way too gooey to eat. All this for a boy I don't even like in 'that way'? No more boy posts for at least a day! Food... I promise the next one will be about food. At least it's simple and sure to stick around... especially on the hips :)

Patience & Persimmons

So I've decided not to call either Mr or Salsa Boy for the time being. Boys, like food take up much of my thought. But food, unlike boys never seems to let me down so miserably... Goodness! Somebody throw a bucket of water over me and slap me across the face please!? Sometimes though, I feel like I need to chill out a little and just go with the flow a little more. I think it's definitely important to make an effort, but sometimes it's also good to just sit back and see how things pan out. I know Mr will call me sooner or later - I just don't want him to feel like I'm pushing things too much. Plus, after pulling out all stops the other night, I feel like I sometimes get a little carried away. As for Salsa boy, I don't know if he'll ever make the effort to get in contact with me? I will surely bump into him eventually at some Salsa night (seeing as I know exactly which ones he goes to!). But I'm not too concerned with that either... I know I definitely don't want to be with him, but I do want to dance with him again! It's nice for two souls to speak to each other without words sometimes.

As for me, I'm just trying to enjoy this time as much as possible... And not think about boys too much! After all I think girls my age are like ripe persimmons... we're still firm and crunchy on the outside, but once you take a bite, we're all sweet and goey on the inside... Hmmm... I don't know if that was the right way to describe us... It sounds more like something out of a porno?! Yikes. But you know what I mean, we haven't gotten bitter yet (although persimmons are more bitter when they are young?) and we're mature enough not to be too gooey inside (which persimmons are more like when they are overripe?). Hmmm... maybe we are like reverse cycle persimmons?

Sneaky Supper

Just got back from a sneaky late night supper at Chat Thai! Yum! Not so good for the belly, but there's just something so cheeky and fun about eating late at night. Plus, it was my Bestie's Birthday, and he had to work all day... So I thought it would only be right to take him out for a bite to eat! Our stomach's brought us together... and our mutual Pinoy-ness kept us together! Big love to my Bestie :) And in ode to my special friend, I made some more salted croutons (the same ones I used for the cheese course the other night) as he is an amazing chef, and the one who taught me how to make these. So here's how to make the yummiest, and simplest treat:



My Bestie's Simple Salted Croutons:


Slice a baguette into fine slices - 2mm thick (This is great for using up stale bread... as long as it's not mouldy!). Pre-heat oven to 180C. Drizzle sliced bread with Olive Oil and season generously with Sea Salt (Maldon Salt is what I use). Bake in oven for 7-10 mins until croutons are golden and crunchy! If you can wait, let them cool... or if you're like me, eat them like chips while they're still hot! I can never wait :( Once cool, keep in air tight container for up to a week.

Eat your heart out...

So dinner with Mr went pretty well tonight. I'm an eater. Not a cook, but I suppose that love for really good food, means a love for cooking. I'm just scared to do it myself. I know so many great chefs, and have eaten many wonderful meals... to think I could do it myself? Seems too imposible. But tonight, somehow I pulled it off. I don't even remember the last time I cooked... I live by myself, which means that cooking is a waste of time, money and mess most of the time. But having the pleasure to cook for someone else is something of a treat. So I planned a four course meal for Mr and me, and it went a little something like this...





First course: Warm Asparagus Salad with Pickled Beetroot, Goats Curd & Hazelnut Vinaigrette:

This is from Justin North's cookbook, I modified it a little by adding the goat's curd, and changed a few of the ingredients cause I didn't have everything in my cupboard. It seemed to work though!


Serves 2

8 Asparagus Spears (peeled)
1 Pickled Baby Beetroot (I did this myself, it was super easy)
Goats Curd
Baby Lamb's Toungue (or Tat Soi if you can find it, but any micro herb will do that's not too overpowering)
Hazelnut Vinaigrette (2 tspn Dijon Mustard, 40ml Red Wine Vinegar, Salt & Pepper, 40ml White Truffle Oil, 40ml Grapeseed Oil, 1 tspn Sugar, 2 tbspn Crushed Hazelnuts - Roasted)

The only cooking you have to do with this, is to sautee the asparagus spears at medium heat for about 3 mins, until they start to colour but are still firm and slightly crunchy. It's sooooo delicious! Then arrange all the ingredients on the plate.

Second Course: Duck a L'Orange


This is a French Classic, and something I should have never tried to cook for the first time, especially for someone who considers their second home Paris! But, of course being stubborn and determined, I tried this recipe from Gourmet Traveller, and Mr seemed to love it... aparently it's one of his favourite dishes :)

Serves 2

2 Duck Breasts (about 200g each)
1 bunch Baby Carrots (trimmed & peeled)
1 cup Chicken Consomme (Campbell's brand from the supermarket is pretty good)
40ml Grand Marnier
1 tbspn Red Wine Vinegar
1 tbspn Honey
1 Orange (peeled and thickly sliced horizontally)
Cinnamon Quils


Score the fat on the duck, and rub generously with salt. Leave in the refrigerator wrapped in paper towel for a couple of hours. Heat a large pan with butter over medium heat and cook the duck skin side down for 5-7 mins until skin is crisp. Turn duck and add carrots. Cook for another 5-7 minutes. Take both duck & carrots of heat, wrap in foil and leave in warm place to rest. In the pan with the remaining butter, add consomme, grand marnier, red wine vinegar & honey. Bring to boil and reduce by about half (about 5 mins) Add orange slices, cook until heated through. Season to taste. Serve duck with orange slices, carrots, cinnamon quils and watercress for garnish.


Course Three: Italian Goats Cheese with Pastillia Nash Prune & Walnut Log


Unfortunately I didn't get a picture of this one :( It was so yummy, I gobbled it down before I could even think to take a pic... Instead I posted a pic of the delicious hazelnuts I roasted. But this one is so super easy... the most important part is getting a really yummy and good cheese. My recommendation is to visit Carmello down at Ocello, the cheese shop on Bourke Street, Surry Hills.



La Tur (Italian Goats, Sheep & Cows Milk)
Pastillia Nash Prune and Walnut Log (finely diced)
Honey
Salted Croutons

Smear the super ripe, yummy cheese onto the salted croutons, and top with diced log & honey! Yes, it's that simple! And believe me... you won't regret it... Yummmmmmmmm. Anyway, what's dinner without a cheese course?


Fourth Course: Apple Tarte Tatin



And, in keeping with the French theme, I finished off our meal with the all time classic Apple Tarte Tatin. Again, super easy. I made it ahead of time and put it in the oven just as we were having our cheese course! Also slightly modified from a recipe I found in Gourmet, this was the perfect way to end the meal!

Makes 4


2 sheets Puff Pastry
2 Granny Smith Apples (peeled & sliced)
Melted Butter
1 tbspn Demerara Sugar
1/4 tspn Ground Cinnamon
Maggie Beer Burnt Fig Ice Cream


Pre-heat over to 180C. Cut 4 circles into the pastry sheets. Arrange apple slices in a circle on the pastry. Brush generously with melted butter. Combine sugar & cinnamon in small bowl and sprinkle over tarts. Bake in oven until golden brown (about 15mins) Serve with a generous scooop of ice cream.


So there you have it! If you've gotten to here and you're still reading, I'm impressed! Recipes don't really do it for me, but I thought it was important to add them, seeing as they were so simple and easy. Even for someone who doesn't cook a lot. I do watch a lot of cooking though! (On television & at work...) I suppose the most important piece of advice is, just do it. And if you feel stupid and don't know what something in the recipe is, don't worry! We've all been there! Just call your mum, or your friend that cooks a lot, or your cousin who is a chef... and just ask them. Don't feel silly about it... I was hoping I would find 'Demerara Sugar' in the sugar isle, and luckily I did. Phew... that's one phone a friend I didn't have to use this time. But seriously, like men, food and cooking can be so intimidating. But they shouldn't be, and once you get over that hurdle, it is so rewarding! And the taste will go on in your mind long after Mr has left you alone on your couch. All that, and I sleep alone tonight? Hmmm, who cares? Tonight, I think I will heart my eat out, and not eat my heart out...

Hearts on display...

This is the thing about blogging... it's out there on the world wide web. I have a journal where I've written my personal thoughts and feelings for the past 15 years or so. But no one ever has to read them... Being me, I always seem to be so brutally honest and open about my life and putting it in a blog just seems like trouble waiting to happen... But nevertheless here I am divulging personal information about my life as if I had verbal diarrhoea. So... I guess I better start from the beginning... no, not the beginning of my life, but the beginning of me. The beginning of me being a sole person, which has never happened before in my adult life. Not until about a year ago, and which I had not actually come to terms with till about five months ago.

Don't worry, I won't make this too long (the operative word being 'too'). Previous to me meeting myself as a single person last year, I had been in a pretty intense relationship with my Soul Mate for almost four years. And previous to that, I had been dating my best friend, and Childhood Sweetheart for four and a half years... literally till the day I started dating Soul Mate. So for the first time in over eight years, I was not in a serious relationship and so I filled my time with buying an apartment, quitting my job, starting a new job and reigniting my love affair with my First Kiss from high school. After a passionate and unexpected reunion with First Kiss, he ditched me yet again and dropped off the face of the planet. Which takes us to about the time I realised I was actually by myself...

I finally had to deal with the fact that I did not have a boyfriend, to fill my time and to give my energy to, and to avoid getting to know myself. But, since then I have in fact met myself several times... through my depression, loneliness, joy and freedom of being single. And I decided I actually don't mind myself... most of the time anyway.

Being the lover that I am... I can't help but fall in love. Not necessarily in the sense of romantic love though... I've fallen in love with all the things I've realised I've been missing out on. Or, rather the things I hadn't allowed myself to discover because I was too busy being a 'we' instead of being a 'me'. And of course, being a lover of boys and being single for the first time in forever, I just couldn't help myself in that department either. Don't worry, I haven't jumped into a relationship again... but I'm seeing the world with new eyes. After all (as the song playing is ironically singing) "I'm young free and single, I just want to mingle with you..." So I've been going out, and meeting new people. Fresh new and interesting people who have inspired and moved me in ways I didn't know were possible.

There are two in particular who come to mind... and who you will probably hear lots more about in future blogs... First there's Mr.... Mr.... how do I name him? Maybe it'll be best to describe him first, and that will help me name him. He is mature and sensible (that makes him sound so boring! But I assure you he is not), we have so much in common, and he is grounded, driven and passionate about what he does. I almost want to name him Mr Sensible, because the sensible side of me thinks he is totally perfect for me... but I'm only starting to scratch the surface with getting to know him, and being sensible seems so boring, which again, he isn't. Don't worry, his name will surely come to me. For now, I guess I'll just call him plain and simple Mr. So Mr and I have been hanging out for a little while now, and the more I know him, the more I like him. We both enjoy doing the same things, and we're both in the same boat... he has also come out of a long term relationship not too long ago and not ready for another relationship. Right from the beginning, it's been really great. Easy, open, honest and fun. And the more I know him, the more relaxed I feel around him. He is someone I really respect as a person, and I like so many qualities of his personality. He makes me feel like I can be anyone I want... I suppose that's the beauty of being with someone who doesn't really know you... You CAN be anyone you want, cause it's a blank slate. No preconceptions, no expectations.

Then there's Salsa Boy. In my new found self, I found I LOVE salsa dancing and latin music. For some reason, it really speaks to me. The culture, the soul of it... I feel like it belongs inside of me. Like in some past life I must have been a latin beauty... (that's my fantasy, and I'm sticking to it! My surname is Spanish, so it must be a sign!) Anyway, so I had been going to Latin nights at one of my local clubs and dancing with random people. That's one of the great things about the culture and dancing. It's so approachable... someone asks you to dance, and you dance. You dance with all your heart, your soul, your body. Then the song finishes, and you smile, introduce yourself and dance with the next person. I've met a lot of wonderful people, and don't feel so bad about going out by myself, because you know there'll always be someone who will take your hand and share a wonderful moment with you, but not make you feel indebted to them for it. So anyway, I got introduced to Salsa Boy by a friend, and we danced. For the first time, I didn't want the song to end, I didn't want to ever stop dancing with him. Not only was he a fantastic dancer, he also plays several instruments in the band. And just like that, he changed something inside of me. It was like he spoke to my soul. And it's not even a sexual thing. Because again, I don't want him to be my boyfriend, and I don't even need to be intimate with him... I just want to be around him... He knows I have a crush on him, but he doesn't want a girlfriend. Of course he doesn't! He's a musician and a great dancer and probably has girls dripping off him... I just want to be a part of his world though... I want to be near him. Spend time with this person who somehow opened up my soul and doesn't even know it. The weird thing about all this is, I've started writing poetry again and also started writing songs, as if they had always been there waiting to get out. Where the f*** did he get the key to my soul from? And how can he be so non-chalant about opening it up?

Both these people have had such a profound impact on my existence and they don't even know it. One has given me the stage to be anyone I want to be, and has been patient enough with me to let me discover it... The other has unlocked this soul deep inside me that feels ancient and opressed and has finally been set free... And at the same time I didn't have to sacrifice being alone and independent for any of it. I feel blessed to know them both, but both leave me wanting more. In different ways? I don't know...

So there we go... that's the 'Loving' part covered so far. The eating part... my other true love, that will come. At the moment I'm too broke to be eating anything very moving. But! I have decided that I'm going to cook dinner for Mr tomorrow. Not that I cook... I eat. But it'll be an interesting meal, and I will surely report with details soon. Stay tuned...

Eating, Loving & The Blues

So... here I am, another bloddy blogger. But I just couldn't resist. My name is Kylie, but you can call me KY, as my friends do... I know, an embarassing nickname that an ex-boyfriend gave me, and even introduced me to his mum as! But anyway, this is my blog... all about eating & loving... and sometimes the blues.