Dating Dilemmas

Before this stint of being single, I hadn't been single in at least eight years. And unlike what people may think from reading my blog, it's not like I'm now going nuts dating every single guy I meet. In fact this whole 'dating' thing is really confusing to me. It seems the rules are very vague, lines get blurred, and where there are lines, they seem to be very fine. Being single has been great in the fact that I've been open to meeting new people, and the ones that have made a certain impact on me, I feel I want to share with you... But I don't want people to misunderstand... and think I'm being careless with people's hearts or feelings. Or that I'm whoring myself around... Maybe I've been too non-chalant about this whole thing. Maybe I've shared too much... or the wrong things? I know I've been hurt lots. Maybe I'm scared to be in a relationship again? I know that I don't want to put myself, or anyone else through the unnecessary hardship that relationships sometimes bring. Maybe I'm freaking out? Nevertheless, I know that I'm searching for more. Like we all are I suppose... Isn't that what everyone wants really? To be validated, and loved, and wanted, and to make someone really, really happy? I'm confused and I'm searching, and I don't know if I'm doing the right thing, if I'm in the right place, if I'm making a mistake or if I'm going to be alright at the end of it all... But I know I can say that I am trying honestly and openly to find the thing we're all looking for. I guess the hardest thing sometimes, is being completely honest with ourselves about what it is we actually want, and the truth about how we are going to get it... I'm on this crazy rollercoaster that is new and exciting and fun. And scary. And I want to put it down for the record that these are only snippets of my thoughts, and although they could so easily be miscontrued, sharing these thoughts with you helps me feel not so alone on this journey. And maybe, someone will totally get this and not feel so alone on their journey either...